Wednesday, September 28, 2011

The Redskinny

After a harsh loss in Dallas Monday night, local DC area scientists now believe they have pinpointed the exact cause of rapid redskin stinkage. A overtly lackluster performance at quarterback, scientists now say, can be attributed to the emergence of a thought-to-be extinct version (mcnabb) of prehistoric quarterback. This new starting redskins qb belongs to a species of quarterback just recently identified by local historians and is being widely acclaimed for creating a subspecies all of its very own. 

The prehistoric quarterback of the hometown skins from Monday night is being referred to as a new subspecies called Interceptasaurus Rex, belonging to the genus Ineptitudiactyl, a creature prevalent in this decades amount of famous quarterback chokes.

This is the second appearance of this not so rare species of quarterback to lead its herd of skins thus far this season, though scientists agree they have seen his kind before, but not of the magnitude that warranted for the branding of its own unique subspecies.

The season began against the giants with the extremely rare discovery of quarterback which is now become known as Convertasaurus Rex. Though officials claim this was the only one of its kind and has since become extinct.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Ride that cowboy Revis! Romo? No no!

They call me Tony Turnover.

Rocky Romo. You get the idea.

Romo is a shitty homo probably used to let Felix smash Jessica while he jerks off cuz he would choke if he actually got in on the action. (Originally published week 4 of football season.) Edit at week 13: Romo is now short for roman god. You or I are not to question his early season ineptitude and are to just continue worshipping in awe of his NFC domination.